An Interesting Thought I Read

I was reading somewhere that worship of God and spending time with God is not just about reading the word and praying. It is also when you listen to worship music, think on the things of God, and do things in pursuit or to bring glory to Him. It is not just a narrow set of how you spend your time. I suppose that makes sense because that is the way relationships are with other people too is it not?

You think about them, how you can better interact with them, what kinds of gifts they would like for their presents, and stuff. But also spending time with them going to movies or just hanging out and eating some chips and drinking sodas. Time spent with those you care about is not always about talking about deep stuff, your cares, worries, or anything else. Sometimes it is just being in the presence of one another and just being. I guess it should not have surprised me that would apply to seeking out God.

Just had a speaker come and talk about love, dating, marriage, sex, and singleness at church. It went well I think. There was a good turn out when compared to the other events we have had and this one excelled in that it had a fair number of men as there were women. Usually the audience is mostly or all women and the men are absent. I cannot wait to get the video and sound files to put together the video of the talk!

Balancing the Rod and the Staff

One of the many things I struggle with is the balance between the discipline of God and the grace of God. It seems to me that trying to get a right, balanced view of it is hard, not only because we tend to focus on what we’re pre-disposed to focus on, but people I meet tend to only focus on grace. It seems that whenever you speak out the discipline of God or approach the suggestion of that, someone is always quick to bring in the grace of God. I suppose that is what I struggle with.

It seems that if you talk about discipline people don’t want to hear about it and instead concentrate on grace. Like discipline is some sort of disease that doesn’t happen if you don’t bring it up. Maybe it is the way that I bring it up, or maybe they think I am forgetting grace when I speak about the discipline. I do suppose that sometimes I make it seem like “if I don’t do this, I shall be punished” but that’s not really it.

God is clear that he disciplines those he loves with the rod and that “[h]e who withholds his rod hates his son, but he who loves him disciplines him diligently” (Proverbs 12:24,NASB) and “[m]y Son, do not regard lightly the discipline of the Lord, nor faint when you are reproved by Him; For those whom the Lord loves he disciplines, and he scourges every son whom he receives.” (Hebrews 12:5, NASB)

God does not shy away from discipline or saying that He disciplines. I get the feeling a lot of people concentrate on the grace of God because it’s comforting, emphasizing forgiveness to the extreme which isn’t a balanced view. But I suppose that’s how we tend to function as sinners don’t we? Going to extremes.

Or maybe it is because I make it sound like the reason why I strive to do well is because God will discipline me which is a wrong attitude to have. Our wanting to do good shouldn’t come from a place of fear, but instead a place of love. “There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves punishment, and the one who fears is not perfected in love.” (1 John 4, NASB)

I suppose that is what my real struggle is, the balance between reverencing God knowing that He disciplines because He loves, and living, doing good in walking with Him and wanting to do good to grow in His love. That love is reason enough to resist sin. “You have no yet resisted to the point of shedding blood in your striving against sin…” (Hebrews 12:4, NASB) And I have not resisted to the point of shedding blood. I find that I give in and do the things I do not want to do, neglecting the good things I want to do like Paul in Romans 7.

Walking in Step with the Lord?

There’s one thing about being self-employed, you sure have a lot of time on your hands if you’re not a “rain maker” with lots of connections and the ability to network like crazy. But that leaves me with a lot of time to follow after God… or not follow after God. But whatever the case, I can no longer use “I am too busy with my work to do that for you Lord” which may have been the whole point of this period in my life.

Since getting laid off I went on my first short-term mission, started a ministry, actually followed through with ministry activities and planning for bigger things, joined the prayer team, started hearing from God more, reading the Bible more consistently (read more than never), and studying the Bible too boot. Not that I do any of those things spectacularly, or that it is not a struggle to do it. But God has been rewarding me with speaking to me more through those whom I interact with.

Also, I have been day dreaming, and dreaming, more about teaching people, leading the ministry I seem to have gotten myself into, and I have come to be more concerned about what we do in that ministry. It scares me, disturbs me, and excites me. But mostly, I am trying not to be so resistant to leading and setting up all these things — especially since planning and coordinating is the thing I hate. Also, since I have never really done that stuff, I am finding that there are a lot of areas I am falling short, but at the same time learning a lot.

Gah, it’s a mess.